Day One...well kind of

Good Afternoon blogisphere...

Well well...here I am again, at the start of yet another journey of weight loss.  First things first, I'm not doing this under the notion that I think anyone will read this blog, I don't deem myself, or my journey, as that important to the world.  I need to do this for me because I need this time to be different.  This blog is how I plan on holding myself accountable to my weight loss goals. 

I sat down at my desk this morning and my fat pants were digging uncomfortably into my belly and my back was sore and in general I was just feeling gross.  I got to thinking about where I wanted to be in my life and what it would take to get there.  Even though I can never quite see what it is I am doing with my life, I can clearly see what I look like when I get there.  Let me tell you, what I see is not some frumpy chick who is in last year's summer clothes because the idea of going shopping and trying on clothes (desperately hoping to not have to travel into the plus size side of the store) is just plain exhausting.

I instantly wrote to my husband (who was 130 lbs soaking wet when we met and has since bulked up in our home gym) "I'm going to lose weight, it's time to look and feel better".  He replied with "did you smoke crack this morning?" to which I replied "no, the time just feels right to smarten up". 

I'm 27 years old, been married almost a year and a half.  I work a desk job.  Have 2 dogs, 2 cats and a brand new pick up truck.  Life is good, I really can't complain.  Have we've been handed our trials, yes.  Is life perfect, no.  I have learned over the past year that the only thing in life that you can control is your own actions.  It's time to take control.

About weight loss...I've done it all...Weight Watchers (1,2,3...times), LA Weight Loss, exercise regimes, 30 day Shred, competitions with girl friends...and the list goes on.  They always work...I lose between 20 and 30 pounds, figure I'm doing great and that I don't really need watch the food I eat anymore because I know what I should and should not eat and alas, I end up back where I started. 

At my heaviest I weighed 220 lbs.  As an adult at my lightest, weighed around 175 lbs.  Ideally, I like to think I would be extremely comfortable around 160 lbs.  Most recently, I lost 15 lbs (going from 210 - 195lbs) as my husband and I were trying to make babies.  Needless to say, we got some not great news at the beginning of April and I've been packing back on the pounds since.  What I weigh now is anyone's guess.  I would not be shocked if I was back to about 210 lbs.  Tomorrow morning will be DAY ONE of this venture.  I will weigh myself on our non-digital scale (that I think actually comes in a little light) and start there.

I choose to live a healthier lifestyle.  In order to do that, I will eat out less, eat more fruits and vegetables, eat less red meat and eat in smaller portions.  I will get more exercise and I will not criticize myself.  I will look to my husband and friends for help and support however, this is my battle and it is up to me to be committed to it.  No one can do this for me.

Where this blog will go, I don't know.  What will be written, no idea.  But I promise to myself, I will write and I will win this battle!!